Ergo
by CassusFacade
Summary: A man awakens in Sword Art Online with no memory. A player with no name, no icon, and no idea what SAO is. A player that, as far as anyone else can see, shouldn't be able to exist. In a hunt for his past, he must fight for survival in the death game of SAO. But even trapped in a game where monsters are everywhere and death is permanent, the biggest danger is other players.
1. Prologue: Awakening

There was the sensation of weightlessness, adrift in a storm of sound. He slowly woke to a myriad of noises. There was the sound of rushing wind, the flapping of cloth and the chattering of metal plate. Most pressingly, what he noticed first were the screams. His eyes snapped open as he came to. He was airborne, and he was falling. His voice joined the others as he plummeted downwards. The Man craned his neck, searching for the source of the other voices.

As he tumbled, he saw a figure below him, slack and silent. They were falling towards a lake. Above him were three more figures, their bodies covered in a strange red streak, like a glowing gash. Above them he saw the edge of a rapidly receding cliff. What looked like the tail of some massive beast whipping over the side before disappearing from sight. The voices of the other three were silenced when their bodies shimmered, and suddenly burst into sparkling shards.

Still tumbling, he again saw the lake, seemingly rushing up to meet him. The man below him shattered on impact into the same bizarre shards and polygons. He was out of breath; he hadn't stopped screaming since he came to. His hands shot to his head as a blinding pain filled his being. He curled into a ball of agony, and finally, blacked out before plunging into the water.

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Wet. Everything was wet. He could hear rushing water. His head was submerged as a wave rolled over him. Coughing and sputtering, the Man opened his eyes. He was on a beach. His mind was still sluggishly catching up. He weakly pulled himself forward, out of the reach of the waves, and flopped over onto his back.

_How long have I been out?_

In the distance, he could still see the cliff. It was a plateau with a winding path connecting it to the shore farther off.

_I…fell from that?_

He pulled himself to his feet, wiping the sand from his face. There was no sign of the others he had seen in the air. His mind now fully awake, he recalled how they'd disintegrated. Confused, he shook his head, and noticed for the first time something in the side of his vision. In the upper left of his field of vision there was a horizontal bar. It was mostly empty, save for the yellow bar inside of it filling it to about a third. He reached for it, but whatever it was, it wasn't in front of him. The Man rubbed his eyes, then looked down, then up and around. The odd bar seemed to follow, like it was in his eyes.

_What is that?_

He shook his head a little more before it dawned on him that the strange object cluttering his vision was the least of his concerns. He looked around, trying to get his bearings. Behind him some distance was a smooth grey wall. It extended in all directions. It wrapped all the way around the beach, all the way to opposing shore on the other side of the plateau and back. His eyes followed the wall's upward curve until he was looking straight up. What he originally thought was an overcast sky was the ceiling. Everything he could see was in one massive room.

_Where the hell am I? Am I underground?_

With those questions asked, the Man felt a growing sense of unease in the pit of his being. Starting to panic, he started searching around again.

_What is this place? _The man clutched his head, starting to pace._ The last thing I remember…is falling off that cliff. No…just falling. Why did I fall? Think. Think think think. Think! Why was I up there? What knocked me off? The hell did those people fall apart like that?!_

It was at this moment the Man came to an uncomfortable realization. The Man didn't know much of anything, including the Man's name.

Still weak, he dropped to his knees. He irritably took another swipe at the phantom bar, still hanging in his view.

_Ok, don't panic. _He thought to himself. _Take a deep breath. Take a few. Ok. Think…what have I got on me._

He looked down at himself. He was wearing what looked like mostly leather armour, with a dull grey breastplate and wrist guards. There was a leather sheath with no sword on his right hip, and a six inch dagger strapped handle down to the left side of his breastplate. In a pouch on his left hip was with a pair of roughly palm sized crystal bricks. One was blue, and the other was a peach-ish yellow. Both had some metal wrapped around some of the edges in a pattern. He puzzled over them for a moment, but couldn't think of what they might be, and put them back into the pouch. On his back, his belt had what felt like room for two knives, but only one was present. Pulling the remaining knife out, he saw it was a four inch throwing knife. Standing back up, he looked himself over again before putting the knife back.

_So…I'm some kind of soldier, or something? That doesn't sound right. _

He was about to ask himself what time it was when he caught sight of a four digit number in the bottom left of his vision reading six thirty. He waited a minute and watched the number count forward to confirm it was indeed a clock. Like the bar, it just seemed to exist in his field of view.

_Well, that's…convenient. I have a clock in my head. Pretty sure that's not normal._

The only landmarks he could see in the room were the plateau in the center of the lake, and the winding footpath connecting it to the shore about a kilometer away. With nowhere else to go, the Man starting trudging towards the latter. Halfway there, he saw there was a large double door built into the wall near the path. With a vague memory of his glimpse of a monstrous creature on the plateau, the door was decided to be the more appealing destination. Picking up his pace, he reached it in short order. It was larger than he expected; twice his height and three meters across.

_Only one way to go. _He thought, grabbing the handle.

The door opened inwards. He only grabbed one handle, but once pulled, both sides opened on their own. Beyond was a vaulted circular room with openings into three corridors. Each was a few meters wide and as tall as the door, made of stone and lined with lit torches. He couldn't see the end of any of corridors, or where they might lead. It looked like the inside of a castle, but without any windows or recognizable landmarks there was no way to discern where he was.

_Great. _

"Hello?" He called out. "Anyone?"

Only his echo answered him. He flinched as the door closed behind him with a loud thud. Getting claustrophobic, the Man chose a path at random and made his way. After several twists and turns he was no longer sure he could find his way back to the door if he'd wanted to. He stopped at a four way crossroads. The Man was looking down each path when he heard footsteps coming from somewhere.

The Man reeled around, figuring out which direction they were coming from. He started down the corridor, calling out again. "Hello?"

The footsteps stopped. A moment later they resumed, louder. The Man broke into a sprint. Rounding a corner, he nearly collided with the source of the footfalls. Before him stood a green-skinned lizard in the shape of a man easily a head taller than him. It was unclothed, save for iron bracers and greaves. It was holding a menacingly large cutlass.

The Man nervously reached for his dagger, slowly backing away. "H-hello?"

The creature let loose a loud screech, and leapt forward, slashing with its sword. The Man stumbled backwards, the sword cutting into his chest. He looked down, expecting to see his organs spilling out, but saw a bright red streak where he'd been hit. The bar in his vision emptied to a quarter and turned red. The Man pulled his dagger, but it was comically small compared to the creature's blade. With another screech, it swung again. Without thinking, the Man took a defensive stance. His knife glowed blue, and deflected the beast's sword. After a moment of feeling completely rigid, he tried backing away, but bumped into a wall behind him.

The creature advanced with a downwards slash. The Man ducked right, narrowly dodging the blade, and sprang forward, driving his shoulder into his opponent in a tackle. The two toppled over together, the Man recovered first, leapt onto the lizard and started stabbing it. The creature wailed. The dagger leaving the same red marks on it as its sword had on him. He felt like he wasn't having any effect when he noticed a hovering bar over the creature's shoulder. It was nearly identical to the one still floating in his view, and with each stab, the bar emptied, with only a red portion left. There was also a red icon hovering over its head, above the words "Salamander Soldier". Unable to use its large sword to attack him while he was on top of it, the creature reared back its head, howled and bit him, its jaws clamping onto his shoulder. With a jerk of its neck it threw him off.

The Man lost his grip on his dagger, and heard it skitter across the floor. His bar emptied down to a red sliver, and started flashing. The creature was already on its feet, advancing, raising its sword. The Man reached behind him, grabbed his remaining knife, and threw it. It flew forward, straight into the lizard's throat. The creature stopped, shimmered, glowing as if it was lit from within, and shattered, bursting into gleaming shards. His throwing knife clattered to the ground.

_I'm alive. _He thought, shaking from the sudden adrenaline rush. _Ok, so maybe I _am_ some kind of soldier, or something. Either way, I'm certainly not welcome here. I need to get the hell out of here._

There was a quiet beeping tone as a flat square panel appeared in front of him. It listed information about XP and col gained. The Man stared at it in confusion, when it disappeared a moment later.

_What's an XP, or a col?_ The Man pondered.

He was reaching down to retrieve his throwing knife when he heard more footsteps. The Man looked over his shoulder; there were two more of the lizard soldiers approaching, likely attracted by the commotion of the fight. The Man couldn't see where his dagger had fallen. There was angry hiss as a third lizard approached from the left.

"Shit." The Man started again finding himself backing away.

The creatures charged.

* * *

Authors Notes:

I hope you like OCs and long fics, because this is going to be a long fic full of OCs. With that tautology out the way, I hope you enjoy Ergo.


	2. Chapter 1: A Trustworthy Figure

The Man ran down the corridor as fast as his legs could carry him. His feet skidded along the smooth stone floor as he slowed to make a sharp right turn. Soon after he took another left. The same looking walls rushed past; for all he knew he'd already been down this way. Exploration, however, was not his objective. Judging by the angry hissing and growling coming from behind him, he'd not managed to lose his pursuers. They sounded like they were gaining on him. Hazarding a look over his shoulder, he ducked just in time to miss a slash aimed for his head.

Taking another sharp turn, he heard the bulkier creatures behind him crash into the wall, howling as they resumed their chase. The turn led him into a large multi leveled room with a spiral staircase leading downwards and a railing. In a rush, the Man chose the latter, and vaulted over the side, hoping the floor wouldn't be too far below. After a five meter drop, he landed hard, tumbling forward onto his face.

Quickly regaining his footing, he surveyed his surroundings. There was an open corridor to the left, and two double doors, one to the right with green metal trim, and the closest straight ahead, with red. Wanting to put anything between him and the things trying to kill him, the Man ran for the door ahead. The door wouldn't open.

He turned at the sound of the creatures leaping over the railing and landing with a trio of resounding thuds. Each was a head taller than him, with pale green scales and various portions of leather armour. Each carried an intimidating large sword, with a red shape floating above their heads, over text reading "Salamander Soldier". They spotted him.

The Man tried to open the door with renewed vigour brought by panic, but it wouldn't budge. Out of time, he ducked under a sideways slash by the first creature to reach him that came so close he could hear the blade whistling through the air. He dove left, out of the way of a downwards strike by the second. The third creature was between him and the open corridor. With nowhere left to run the Man made a break for the green-trimmed door.

The door pushed open, and without looking at what was inside, the Man rushed in. He ran headlong into a very surprised looking pair of individuals. There was a young woman and a figure covered in a tattered red cloak, most of his face hidden by a mask. With no time to alter his course, he passed by the woman, and bowled over her companion. The figure under him let loose a string of expletives and roughly shoved him off.

The salamander soldiers wasted no time in dividing their attention amongst their new targets. The figure in the red cloak was already attacking the lead soldier when the Man was still scrabbling to his feet. From within his cloak he had drawn an exotic sword with a golden blade. The shape was like a combination of sword sickle and hook. Blocking his opponent's strike, he followed with a slash that took his blade through the creature, entering at its left shoulder and exiting at its right thigh. On the return swing, he caught the hook behind the lizard's knee, and with a strong jerk, yanked the leg out from under it. The lizard dropped onto its back. A cut through its throat and its struggle came to an end in an explosion of polygons.

The figure's companion did not fare nearly so well. She was unarmed, and unarmoured. The monster attacking her made a pair of horizontal swings, slicing through her torso. It followed with a thrust, impaling her. Her cry for help was cut short as she shattered. The figure in red spouted and angry curse and attacked it.

The Man took a defensive stance, nervously eyeing the third, remaining lizard as it advanced on him. With only one weapon available, he threw his knife. It flew straight into the creature's chest, burying itself to the hilt. The creature stopped, looked down at the knife jutting from its sternum, and plucked it out. The green bar hovering over its shoulder had only emptied by a fraction. Tossing it aside, it gave a warbling chuckle and sprang forward to attack with a downwards blow. With nothing to block the attack, and no time to dodge, the Man charged forward. He caught the creature's sword arm by the wrist, stopping its strike. Wrenching the arm and sword away, he struck it across the face with a right hook. The salamander soldier made to claw it him with its free hand, but the Man caught the arm before the blow could land. Locked in a stalemate grapple, he could only avoid the lizard's biting jaws when a golden hook grabbed it by its neck. The red clad figure kicked the lizard in the back of the leg and pulled on the hook sword, dropping the screeching monster to the floor. Before it could recover a trio of slashes cut through its chest and silenced it. The room was suddenly quiet as the fight came to a close.

The figure in red was the first to speak, muttering an angry curse to himself. He gestured to where his companion had died. "Nice job, jackass. I've been on that escort quest for three hours!"

Now that things had slowed down, the Man was able to get a better look at the figure who'd saved him. He was wearing a deep maroon cloak that reached down to his calves. Under the cloak he was wearing full lamellar amour, burgundy with gold and yellow trim. The sheath for this exotic sword hung on his left hip. There was a two foot straight short sword sheathed on his right. His face from the bridge of his nose down was covered by a black facemask which, oddly enough, didn't seem to hamper his speech at all. His voice had a gruff, grating edge to it. He was slightly shorter than the Man, had sharp features, and unnaturally red hair the same colour as his cloak that was almost shoulder length. Above him was a floating orange icon. He did not look happy.

"I'm really sorry about your friend. I was just trying to get away from those things." The Man said, starting to feel distinctly unsafe again. "What _were_ they?"

The figure cocked an eyebrow. "My friend? I just said it was an escort quest; an NPC I was supposed to guide out of here. And those were the standard mob in this dungeon. Friggin' everywhere; how'd you get this deep and miss 'em?"

He looked like he was about to continue talking but cut himself off. The figure peered over the Man's head with a thoughtful expression. The Man followed his gaze, but couldn't tell what he was looking at.

After a moment, the red cloaked man stepped forward, sheathing his sword. "I'm sorry, my name is Devlin. Is there something I can help you with?"

The tone was suddenly friendly, but the words sounded fake, like he was reciting lines. Despite how uneasy the rapid shift was, the Man was not about to reject the assistance.

"You said you were escorting that woman out of here. Do you know the way? I woke up on a beach and got lost in here when those creatures attacked me."

"A beach?" Devlin asked.

"Yes. There was a lake in this huge room." The Man clarified. "How big _is_ this place?"

"Plateau in the center?" Devlin added.

"Yes." The Man replied. "You know it?"

"That'd be the boss room." Devlin said casually, before muttering to himself. "That's an odd spawning location."

The Man didn't know what to make of the last statement. "An odd what?"

"Nothing." Devlin answered. "Please, continue."

"Like I said, I'm sorry about your friend," The Man started, "but if you're on your way out of here, can you please show me the way?"

"Great, another escort quest. Well, back to square one, I guess. Nothing lost." Devlin again muttered to himself. "Sure. Suppose you'll want me to take you to town?"

"Is there one nearby? Is it safer than this place?" The Man asked. "Yes, please. Thank you."

There was a long pause before Devlin said. "Welcome."

Another long pause. Devlin shifted from one foot to the other. "And?"

"And?" The Man parroted back.

"And is there anything else you wanted to say?" Devlin asked. "Maybe something about a reward?"

The Man patted himself down. "I don't have any money, or anything."

Even through the mask Devlin's frown was apparent.

"Wait!" The Man reached into the pouch on his side, digging out the pair of crystal bricks. "I have these…things."

Devlin nodded. "You have a deal. Let's go."

There was a third long pause as neither figure moved. The conversation was rapidly turning awkward.

"And?" He again asked.

"And…I don't know where we're going." The Man answered slowly. "You should probably lead."

Devlin paced a few steps back and forth before adding a frustrated "And?"

"What do you want me to say?" The Man asked in exasperation. "Can you help me or not?"

Devlin didn't answer, instead performing a strange wave of his hand in front of himself. A set of flat panels appeared suspended in air with a beeping chime. Ho poked his finger into it a few times, navigating through it.

"Why isn't my quest log updating?" He asked nobody.

"What's that?" The Man asked.

"Yeah, shut up a second." Devlin ignored him, still puzzling over the set of screens.

"What is that?" The Man persisted.

"What is what?" Devlin asked, getting annoyed.

"That. The floating thing. What is that?" The Man asked again.

Devlin stopped prodding the panels. "You can see this?"

"Yeah. I mean, how wouldn't I?" The Man asked, perplexed.

Devlin pointed at the orange icon hovering over his head, his eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Can you see this, too?"

The Man nodded. "I was wondering about those."

Devlin poked the panel, and it disappeared. Taking a few quick steps over, he grabbed the Man by the waist and picked him up, throwing him over his shoulder.

"What the hell are you doing?" The Man asked in surprise. He squirmed free, and landed flat on his back. Before he could get up Devlin's sword was in hand and pointed at his throat.

The Man was on his back, propped up on his elbows, with his hands held up in surrender. "Whoa, there. No need for trouble."

"You're no NPC." Devlin declared. "Why can't I see your icon or health bar? Who are you?"

"I don't know." The Man started scooting away.

"I'm not falling for that." Devlin spat, keeping pace.

"I don't know!" The Man shouted. "I woke up on a beach and I got chased here and that's all I remember! I've spent the entirety of the time I can recall trying not to die and would really appreciate it if you would take your God damn sword out of my face!"

A deep, bassy growl reverberated through the corridor.

The Man slowly pushed the sword away from his throat. "In either case, if you're going to interrogate me, can it be somewhere that isn't here?"

Devlin pulled his sword away. "Fair enough. You try anything and you're dead."

The Man pulled himself to his feet. "You're the one with the sword."

The pair entered the room with the red-trimmed door that the Man hadn't been able to open. Devlin walked up to it, pulled a key from the recesses of his cloak and inserted it into the lock. With a turn, the red trim turned green and the door opened. While they were walking, Devlin performed the same wave of his hand, summoning the floating screens. Waving through it, he pulled up a map. He traced his finger along it as he plotted a path to the exit.

"Looks like we should be out in about twenty minutes or so." Devlin stated.

"If you're not going to threaten to kill me again," The Man started, "can I ask what that is?"

"How can you seriously not know what the menu is?" Devlin adopted a bemused expression. "You're trying way too hard to sell this amnesia thing. Anyways, seeing how I'm getting you out of this dungeon, you can at least do me the courtesy of telling me your name."

"I…don't know." The Man said. He thought hard, but no answers came. "I'm not lying. I can't remember anything before today."

"And you don't know what this is." Devlin said, pointing back up to the orange icon over his head.

"No."

"Ok, here's an easy one." Devlin started. "What is SAO?"

The Man stared blankly as he pondered.

"Sword Art Online?" Devlin clarified. The Man still had no answer. "Wow. Ok, how about telling me what you _do_ know. I get the feeling that'll be the shorter list."

The Man spent the next several minutes recounting everything that had happened up until he had run into Devlin. He answered a couple questions or gave clarifications whenever Devlin asked about his story. The walk was thankfully uneventful, only running into a couple lone creatures which Devlin was able to easily dispatch. Caught up to where they were, the pair stopped at a large wooden gate. Devlin pulled at a lever attached to the wall, and the gate was pulled upwards, opening to the outside. They passed through the threshold, and the gate descended and closed.

Before them was a vast green field of grass flowing in the breeze. Far in the distance, the Man could see a town. Much closer was a pair of stone plinths with a large metal ring connecting the two. As he was watching, a trio of figures walked though it, and vanished.

The Man pointed. "What is that?"

"Teleporter. It leads to the nearest town." Devlin answered.

"And that's how we're getting there?" The Man asked in amazement.

"Nope. We get to walk." Devlin said flatly.

The town looked like it was quite a walk away. "Why?"

"Orange cursor, remember. I can't go in towns." Devlin said, without really explaining anything.

"There a reason for that?" The Man asked.

"Okay, this has gotten old. We're out of the dungeon." Devlin said irritably. "Start talking. For starters, who are you? Where's your icon?"

The Man shook his head. "I told you I don't know!"

"Well, mystery one should be easy." Devlin said. "You see the health bar in the upper left field of view? Should look a lot like the one you see hovering over my shoulder."

"Yeah." The Man answered, waving his hand at where it appeared to him. "Except it's almost hollow. It's just got this red bit that keeps flashing. Is that normal? It's actually starting to get really annoying."

"That means you're on the verge o' death." Devlin explained. "Give me that crystal you have; the yellow one."

The Man dug out the requested crystal and handed it to him. Devlin held it at arm's length in front of the Man and said in a commanding tone "Heal." The crystal evaporated, and the bar in the Man's vision filled green.

"Better?" Devlin asked.

The Man nodded in confirmation.

"Ok, next to the bar should be some text. There'll be a number of how many hit points you have, and then your name and level number." Devlin listed.

The Man could see the hit points, but where the name and level were supposed to be was a blank space. He said as much.

"That's weird." Devlin admitted. "Here, do what I do."

Devlin held out his right hand at shoulder height. Connecting his index finger and thumb, he swept his hand downwards. With a beeping chime, the floating panels reappeared. The Man mimed the movements and the same set of panels appeared in front of him. Devlin closed his own menu and sidled up to the Man's side, directing him through the menu.

"Alright, this is getting really weird. Your player information is all blank." Devlin said. "I think I'm starting to believe you."

"So," The Man started, "what now?"

"Same as before, we go to town." Devlin said, starting his trek. "'Course, we'll need to figure out another way for you to pay me for getting you out of that dungeon."

"What?! You said the bricks were enough." The Man said in surprise, catching up to Devlin.

"Half of which I just used keeping you from becoming a corpse." he replied without slowing. "That, and I still thought you were an NPC. What I really need more than anything right now is a quest. You're going to help me with that. Also, I'm pretty sure if I leave you alone you'll be dead in about an hour, so, you're welcome."

"There's that NPC word again. What does that mean? And how am I supposed to get you a quest, or whatever?" The Man asked.

"NPC. Non Player Character. Not really a person; just a computer controlled character in SAO." Devlin explained.

"Not a person?" The Man was again getting confused. "You mean like your friend back there? You're trying to tell me that wasn't a real person? I saw her, she looked real."

Devlin stopped, and looked the Man dead in the eyes. "Do you even know you're in a game?"

The Man cocked an eyebrow, not sure what to make of that question.

"Oh." Devlin said, realizing the answer. "I'm…I'm not sure how to go about explaining this."

"We've got a long walk." The Man "You've got time to try."

Devlin gave a sigh. "Sure. But if we're going to be together for that long, I'm going to need to call you something."

"Believe me, I wish I had something to tell you." The Man said.

"Well, until you have something better, I'm calling you Buttercup."

"I refuse to answer to that." Buttercup said.

Devlin chuckled. "Fine, you're Noob, for now."

Noob still felt like the word was insulting, but couldn't come up with anything better. He accepted it with a nod. The pair resumed their long walk towards the distant town. Over the next few hours, Devlin explained the concept of SAO and nervegear to a very perplexed Noob. Everything felt real; it was hard to accept that everything he could see was just a computer construct. It did, however, explain a lot. The strange way things died, the floating interfaces and icons, and the lack of pain when he'd fought the first creature he had run into.

"So, all of this is fake?" Noob asked, staring at his hands.

"Yup. You're real body is lying in some hospital bed somewhere." Devlin said. "If you're lucky, you've got someone waiting for you. To tell the truth, sometimes I forget myself that it's just a game, or was supposed to be."

The sun was starting to go down when Devlin had wrapped up a brief retelling of Sword Art Online's in game history. He went over the hijacking of the game by Kayaba Akihiko, summarized the inability of anybody to log out, and the end game objective of beating SAO. He also explained the consequences of in-game death, and its permanence.

"It's been over a year now, but we're still nowhere near done." Devlin said.

"Why would someone do something like this?" Noob asked.

"Who knows. Nobody's seen the guy ever since the game started." Devlin answered. "I guess the same kind of nutcase that expects people to beat an MMO. He's probably out there somewhere, laughing his ass off."

With the sun completely set, and night starting, Devlin altered coarse to a lone tree nearby. Once there, he summoned his menu, and after a few taps, a pixilated haze appeared in front him before forming into a sleeping bag. A moment later a second formed. Devlin arranged them under the tree. With a few more taps, he was holding a pair of sandwiches wrapped in paper.

"Hungry?" Without waiting for a reply, he tossed one to Noob. "We'll camp here tonight and get to town tomorrow."

Noob caught the offered meal. He hadn't realized how hungry he'd gotten until he'd started eating. Come to think of it, it was the first meal he could remember having. "Thanks."

"Y'know, just 'cause we're out of the dungeon doesn't mean we're safe. Mobs can spawn just about anywhere out here, and the spawn rates increase at night." Devlin said between bites of his sandwich. "You have any weapons?"

With his mask pulled down to eat, the Man got his first look at Devlin's full face. He appeared to be in his early to mid twenties, and had a sharp, clean-shaven chin. Catching Noob's scrutiny, he wolfed down the rest of his meal and pulled his mask back up. Noob had lost both his dagger and throwing knife in the dungeon. His sword sheath still hung empty at his side.

"Check your inventory." Devlin said, unzipping his sleeping bag and climbing in. He left the bag unzipped, and placed his sword within reach next to it.

Noob performed the needed motion to call forth his menu, and after some clumsy navigation, found a tab entitled 'Inventory'. He was surprised by how much was contained in its list. There were weapons, food, various portions of armour, and an assortment of gear. Selecting a sword, it formed in front of him, hanging in the air a moment before dropping to the ground. The menu had listed its name as Bone Cleaver. It was a silver one sided blade with crimson filigree running down its length. The blade was concave near the hilt, but was larger near the tip, and pitched forward about thirty degrees at the blade's halfway point. He picked it up, giving it a few practice swings to get a feel for its weight.

"Hey, you figured it out all on your own, good for you." Devlin quipped. "Interesting blade; what kind is it?"

"A Falcata, I guess." Noob read from its description. He looked at the golden sword resting on the ground besides Devlin. "And yours?"

Devlin's sword started out straight, but a third of the way down, it flowed into a convex arc, like the outer edge of a sickle. The blade then curved back in line with the first portion, and abruptly swept back into a hook.

"It's called a khopesh. There's no point on it, so I can't use any stabbing or thrusting skills with it, but it's good enough at cuts and slashes." Devlin said conversationally. "The inside of the hook is unsharpened, though, so it's great for grappling. It was hard to find. Most people just want katanas or broadswords."

Noob returned his attention to his inventory, and summoned a kite shield. Its colouration matched the sword. Once it had formed, he caught it before it fell. Placing the sword and shield next to his sleeping bag, he climbed in. "Hey, you said those…mobs, they spawn more at night, right? Are we really safe sleeping out here?"

"Nope." Devlin answered simply.

"You don't sound worried." Noob stated.

"Not really."

Noob propped himself up on his elbow. "But w-"

"Less talk, more sleep." Devlin cut him off. "Any wandering field mobs aren't usually that strong. More annoying filler than any danger."

Noob scanned the horizon, but couldn't see anything moving. Accepting that he'd wake up again once he went to sleep, he lied back down, staring at the night sky a few moments before closing his eyes. All he could hear was the slight breeze passing by. Not long after, sleep mercifully took him.

_He was standing, but he wasn't in the field. The Man stood in the crossroads of a four way corridor. He was alone. All four hallways seemed to stretch on to eternity. He felt a rushing wind, but everything was silent. The only sound was his own breathing. Far above him was a grey stone ceiling. He heard someone call him, but couldn't make out the name. He whirled around, trying to find its source. The Man was no longer alone. In each corridor stood a figure, their features covered in shadow. Three men, and directly in front of him, a woman. She was crying. Her mouth moved as she spoke, but no words reached him. The Man took a pensive step forward, and suddenly the world was thrown sideways. They were falling, screaming. The four figures shimmered and died. _

"_Heads up" He heard, and something hard slammed into his gut._

The Man rolled across the ground, flopping out of his sleeping bag in a heap. He quickly took to his feet. It was morning. He was starting to search for what had hit him when a boar rammed into him, throwing him onto his back. From there, he could see Devlin, sitting comfortably in the tree.

"Morning." Devlin said, adding a fruit from a nearby branch to his inventory.

Before Noob could retort, the boar made to ram him again. It was nearly five feet long, and came up to his waist. It was covered in brown fur, and had a pair of large upturned tusks. Without thinking, he struck out his foot, kicking it straight in the face and knocking it over. Noob searched the ground for his sword.

"Up here." Devlin said, tossing it to him from the tree.

Noob caught it, and held it high. The blade glowed green, and he struck the boar in a downwards blow that halved its life points. The boar squealed, and made to gore him on its tusks. Noob thrust his sword down its throat, and after a brief struggle, it shimmered and died. A congratulatory screen appeared, accompanied by the sound of slow clapping from the tree.

Noob sheathed his sword, shooting an angry glance up at Devlin. "A little warning would have been nice."

"I did. I said 'Heads up.'"Devlin hopped down from the tree. "Besides, I had to make sure you make sure you weren't completely useless. Just a simple boar; couldn't have hurt you much. How much health did you lose?"

Noob glanced at his health bar. "A little under a fifth. You couldn't have me try something after I'd gotten up?"

"This was much more educational. Entertaining, too." Devlin started packing up camp. "Ok, 'bout a fifth down. I think we're around the same level. Good."

"Glad I could provide some amusement." Noob replied sardonically.

"I said educational, too." Devlin had finished returning the camp items to his inventory and resumed his walk towards town. "You used a sword skill, so, even if you can't remember anything, you still know how to fight. You still have your muscle memory and reflexes."

The Man grabbed his shield and attached it to his left forearm before catching up to Devlin. Noob hadn't even thought about it before, but he could recall his dagger having the same strange glow when he'd blocked at attack back in the dungeon.

"Which brings me to why it's important that you're not useless." Devlin continued. With a few taps and a flourish, he had summoned a breakfast of jerky from his inventory. "I might need you to watch my back when we get to town."

"Care to explain?" Noob asked.

"Sure. You see, my icon is orange." Devlin said, jutting his thumb up over his head. "I want it to be green. Having an orange icon tends to make you unpopular. If I complete a quest, it'll go back to green, but if I get in any unwanted fights with another green player, then it'll be orange forever. I might need you to rattle your sword if anything wants to start something."

"So, I'm repaying you by guarding you?" Noob asked. "What made your icon change in the first place?"

"I may have…instigated some unwanted fights. A green icon changes to orange if you perform some infraction on another green player. If you wait a little bit, it'll change back to green on its own for the first few times." Devlin explained. "If you do some fourth thing within the same time frame, it gets stuck as orange. Only way to get it unstuck is to perform a quest of equal or greater value to your level. You do a fifth infraction, and there's no way to change it back."

Noob slowed his pace. "Wait, are you telling me you're some kind of criminal?"

"No. Sometime shit just happens." Devlin said with a shrug. "Point is, if a green player attacks an orange player, they stay green, but if I end up fighting a green player, I get stuck. Sometimes green players want to feel like a hero, and since I can't defend myself until I get a quest done, I need you around for the time being."

"Like I said, I'm paying you by being your guard." Noob repeated.

"No. You're going to pay me by being my quest mule." Devlin stated.

The pair had almost reached the town's front gate. There were several players in view entering or exiting the settlement. Devlin stopped at an outcropping or rocks about a half kilometer from the town entrance.

"Y'see," Devlin started, "Quests can be found anywhere in the game, but the vast majority of them are found in towns and cities. I'm sure you can spot the conundrum there. I need to complete a quest to be welcome into town, but I have to get into town to get said quest. We're gonna party up, and you're going to go into town and get a quest."

"How will I do that?" Noob asked.

"Look for any NPC with an exclamation point above their heads. It'll be about where an icon would be." Devlin took a seat on a waist high rock. "There might also be a bulletin board. Just ask them how you can help, listen to their story, and accept the mission. It'll share it with me, we'll do the mission, I'll of course do all the work, and we'll be even."

Noob nodded. "Alright, that sounds simple enough."

"Great. Now, let's party up." Devlin opened his menu and opened the invite tab. "Oh, right. Don't know your name. Hmm, odd, I can't see you in nearby players either. You invite me."

Noob opened his menu and searched for the relevant options. After a few moments, Devlin hopped off his rock and reached for Noob's menu. "It's right…here."

"What the hell is this? Your friends menu is greyed out." Devlin took hold of Noob's hand and used it to scroll through his menus. "So are your trade and duel tabs. You don't even _have_ a messaging tab."

"So, this isn't going to work?" Noob ventured.

"Shit!" Devlin reeled and kicked a stone into the distance. A couple players near the town entrance peered their way at the loud outburst. "Why are you so glitched out?!"

"Take that as a no." Noob answered himself.

Devlin paced back and forth a few steps. "Hang on, this can still work, more or less."

Devlin opened his own menu, and summoned a fist sized bag full of gold coins. "Ok, change of plans. Take this, go into town, and find a quest broker. They're like professional mules; they party up and share quests with orange players for coin."

Devlin sat back down on his rock. "Find a guy named Merlot. He'll probably be in a tavern called MakiMori's. Short guy, kinda portly, has black hair. Probably won't talk to you until you buy him a drink. Tell him to come out here. Just get me a quest, _any_ quest, and we're square."

Noob took the offered bag of money. Taking a coin out, he saw it was a gold coin with the word 'Col' and a denomination of value. He placed the bag into his pouch and clasped it shut. Noob nodded, and started towards the town gate.

"One last thing; don't tell anyone I'm out here. People get a little antsy when a red player camps out next to town. Don't want anyone thinking I'm here to cause trouble." Devlin added quickly. "Just get in and get out."

"I'll try not to take too long." Noob said.

"And don't bail on me." Devlin called out from behind him.

_The idea had occurred to me. _The Man thought. However, he had to admit to himself that it was his fault Devlin's previous escort had died, and he had guided him to safety as promised. Despite his misgivings about Devlin's possible unlawful status, he did owe him. It didn't seem like much to pay him back for saving his life.

"Don't worry, I won't." Noob answered over his shoulder.

The town entrance had a large sign reading 'Sveltheim'. Walking through the entrance archway, the Man flinched as a message suddenly appeared in his vision stating 'Inner Area'. Before he could wonder what that meant, it vanished. Once inside, he blended into the crowd and started searching for the tavern.

* * *

Hopefully this is so far sufficiently unterrible. If you've made it this far, thanks for reading, hope you like it.


	3. Chapter 2: A Quest for a Quest

The town of Sveltheim sprawled in all directions around him. Noob walked down the cobblestone street, pondering which direction to search first. The town appeared to be mostly made of single or two storey stone buildings, with some larger structures near the town centre. There were a couple dozen people in the immediate area milling about, but the street seemed unnaturally quiet. The first thing he noticed was that he was a fair bit taller than most everyone around. Looking through the crowd, Noob noted that a person's icon only became visible to him when his attention was directed their way. After his focus was elsewhere, the icons would disappear from his peripheral view. Scanning the people around him, he found that only about half of them had icons. He approached a nearby woman tending a flower stand. Like him, she had no visible icon or health bar.

"Excuse me." He opened, waving to grab her attention.

"Good afternoon, traveler." She replied. The woman gestured to her wares. "Do you see something you like? I have some wonderful white roses."

"They're nice, but no thanks. I'm looking for a tavern." Noob said.

"Perhaps some lazuli blossoms would be more to your liking?" she asked.

"No, thank you. I'm looking for a place called MakiMori's." Noob stated. "Do you know where I could find it?"

"I'm sorry, but I don't know where that is." The woman again gestured to her stand. "I have some fresh tulips, as well as tristeri buds."

"I'm not looking to buy any flowers." Noob said, starting to get frustrated.

"Alright, then." The woman said curtly. "Have a nice day."

She turned away, and set back to arranging and rearranging the flowers in her stand. Noob cocked an eyebrow as she set to watering some of her plants, ignoring him.

He cleared his throat and waved at her again. "Excuse me."

The woman turned back to him. "Good afternoon, traveler. How can I help you today?"

Noob said nothing in return, instead watching the shopkeeper's actions. A few moments passed; she idly shifted from one foot to the other before speaking. "Do you see something you like? I have some lovely tulips."

He still said nothing, curious, watching the shopkeeper. She didn't appear to find his scrutiny discomforting. She didn't seem to notice it at all. "Perhaps some lazuli blossoms would be more to your liking."

"No, thank you." Noob said simply, and turned away.

He walked a dozen paces and turned back. She'd returned her attention to her stand, and the care of her flowers. Noob walked back up and greeted her again.

"Hello again, traveler." She said. "Do you see something you like? I have some wonderful white roses"

"Are you an NPC?" He asked.

"I'm sorry, I don't understand your question." She replied.

Noob thought a moment. "What is SAO? Sword Art Online?"

"I'm sorry, I don't understand your ques-"she started.

Noob cut her off. "What is an NPC?"

"I'm sorry, I don't understand your question." She repeated without pause.

"They don't like it when you break the fourth wall, silly." Someone behind him said with a chuckle.

He whirled to see a woman in bronze armour walking away from him. Noob turned back to the shopkeeper, still idling staring at him. It was becoming incredibly unsettling. Without another word to the shopkeeper, he walked away. A group of five players brushed past him, a couple bumping into him. He excused himself, but save a quick glance, they all ignored him completely. To them, Noob reasoned, he must look like any other NPC. Wanting to get away from the crowd that he was starting to accept wasn't entirely made up of real people, Noob entered the nearest building, a bell above the door ringing as he opened it.

He found himself inside an armoury. There was a young man behind the counter, who gave him a quick glance before returning his attention to his customer, a small girl. Oddly, neither person had an icon, but only the clerk had a health bar. The door chimed again behind him, and Noob turned to see another customer exit, and another enter. An icon appeared over the person leaving, while the icon over the one entering disappeared as he passed through the door.

Noob was puzzling over this when a bit of motion in the edge of his vision caught his attention. What he'd thought was another person at first was a floor to ceiling mirror on the other side of the store. He walked over to it, and realized this was the first good look he'd gotten at himself. He had a broad face with a flat nose and a square chin. His dark brown hair was cut short. He had a thick, sturdy build, like someone who was quite accustomed with heavy lifting. His skin had a deep tan, looking like it'd seen its fair share of sun. There was a pair of measuring markings on either side of the mirror; one in feet and the other in meters. He came up to around six foot five inches, or about a hundred ninety six centimeters.

Noob stared at the mirror. It was unnerving, looking at someone that was obviously himself, but might as well have been a complete stranger. He turned back to the clerk, who was just wrapping up with his customer, and approached the counter. The girl, having completed her purchase, left. Noob noted that no icon appeared over her as she exited; an NPC shopper.

The clerk turned his attention to Noob as he approached. "Hello there. Haven't seen you before. Can I help you find something in particular?"

"Actually, yes." Noob started. "I'm looking for a tavern. Someplace called MakiMori's."

The clerk frowned, surprised by the question. "Not looking to buy anything?"

"No." Noob answered. "I just need to find a tavern."

The clerk squinted as he looked Noob over. He had clearly mistaken him for an NPC, and was curious about his lack of health bar, but was too unsure of his observation to ask about it.

"Do you know where I can find it? I'm supposed to meet someone there." Noob asked, cutting off any inquiries the clerk might have been forming.

"Uh, yeah." The clerk replied. "Maki's is a little west of the center of town."

"Thanks." This person was much easier to talk to than the NPC. "I don't suppose you could give me directions?"

After some unhelpful verbal instructions the clerk ended up writing out directions on a piece of parchment. Noob thanked the man and exited the shop without further conversation. Once again amidst the crowd of half people, and half uncanny not-people, Noob started on his way to his destination. Holding up his directions, he scanned for any helpful landmarks or street signs. Thankfully, the town was a lot smaller than he had originally assumed it to be.

His stomach growled; Noob remembered that he hadn't eaten since the night before. With the parchment in his left hand, he summoned his menu with his right. Scrolling through his inventory, he selected what looked like an iridescent apple. It appeared in front of him in a pixilated haze before forming in the air. It fell to the ground before he could catch it and crumbled back into polygons. Chiding himself, he stuffed the parchment into his pocket and made ready to catch the next fruit. It dropped into his waiting palm.

It was a curious notion; that he could feel hunger for simulated food. Devlin had explained to him that his real body was being sustained in a hospital bed somewhere. Noob pondered; was it possible to starve to death in the game? If he ate here, would his body feel satisfied? He still didn't like the notion that everything around him was fake, and that he was merely trapped in an elaborate illusion when he couldn't remember ever being outside of it. Curtailing his musing, Noob took a bite. It was fibrous, with a bitter flavour and sour aftertaste, and left a chalky residue. It was, in a word, revolting. He spat his mouthful onto the sidewalk, it turning back to voxels and returning to the ether on impact. He dropped the apple to the same fate. Noob tried a few other foodstuffs with the same unsavoury results before giving up and deciding to eat something at the tavern.

_Wow, I had _horrible_ taste. _He thought.

Noob was reaching back for the directions when he caught sight of his destination and broke into a sprint. Reaching the entrance, he looked up at the sign over the door. 'MakiMori's' was written with the first half in elegant cursive in a bright combination of pinks with a border of roses. The other half was written in simple black print within a flat grey boxed border. Noob pulled open the doors, revealing a restaurant and bar much more normal than the sign had him expecting. He glanced at the clock in the lower edge of his vision.

_I think I made decent time._ He thought with a smile.

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With a flick of his thumb, Devlin sent a small dried nut into a brief upwards arc, before it descended into his waiting mouth. He was lying on his back, on top of a two and a half meter flat topped rock. It was the tallest in the vicinity, with several smaller stones and boulders surrounding it. His feet dangled over the side at the knees. He let out a bored sigh as he reached into the sack of nuts held between his thighs and sent another snack skyward. He blinked as it landed on his forehead, before rolling to the stone and disappearing.

"This is taking way too long." He said to nobody in particular.

The next nut missed his head completely. Devlin sat up with an irritated grunt, relenting to a more manual and dependable style of eating.

"He better not've gotten lost." It had been over an hour since he'd seen Noob enter the town. "I can't even message the guy for an update."

Impatient, Devlin pulled a telescope from within his cloak and started surveying the town entrances for what felt like the hundredth time, searching for his mule near the town gates. Sveltheim's walls prevented him from looking inside, so that was about the only place he could search. Devlin twisted his spyglass, increasing its magnification, and did another scan.

"It's just a simple task. Get in, find a guy, get out." Devlin said to himself. "Not complicated."

He lowered his telescope long enough to dig out another handful of nuts and raised it back up to his eye. Devlin was greeted with the image of a man in white armour, holding a spyglass, looking directly back at him. He paused in his chewing. The man on the other end of his telescope said something to the pair of individuals to his side; another, thicker man in black armour, and a woman in grey. He passed the telescope to the man in the middle.

"That's…not good." Devlin waved.

He didn't wave back. The man in black smirked, passed the spyglass back, and exchanged more words with his compatriots. The trio exited the town and headed his way at a brisk pace, with a small assorted group following behind them in a more leisurely stroll.

"Nnnnnope." Devlin said with a sinking feeling. "This is gonna suck."

He returned his handful of nuts to its bag.

"Well, I could make a run for it. I've got a good lead. But then I'd be leaving empty handed. Still, three on one aren't the best of odds, and I can't even fight back. Might not have to fight, though." Devlin held his hands palm up like he was weighing the options. "Then there's my mule. I can't very well abandon the guy. Actually, yeah, I could, but he might still be useful. Still need that quest. He's pretty glitched out; kinda curious about that, too."

His mind made up, he decided to sit back and wait for the trio's arrival.

"I've still got time. Let's see how this plays out." Devlin started to raise his spyglass back up, and paused. "The hell am I talking to?"

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Noob took a quick inventory of the patrons inside the tavern. There were a little over a dozen people inside, but none matched the description of the person he was looking for. He approached the bar, where a young woman with a pink apron was cleaning the inside of a glass. The girl looked to be about sixteen. Noob stepped up and cleared his throat. The girl turned his way, and found herself looking straight into his chest. She tilted her head back to meet his eyes.

"High." She blinked. "I mean, hi. You're new. Welcome to MakiMori's. I'm Maki. Sit anywhere you like."

The girl spoke with a high pitched voice in a rapid fire staccato and wore a wide smile. Noob took a seat at the bar. He was about to ask about Merlot when his stomach reminded him of his hunger. The audible queue was not lost on Maki.

"Can I get you somethin'?" she asked. "We're having a special on beledon steaks."

Noob had no idea what a beledon was, but its association with steak was endorsement enough. There was a blackboard behind the bar listing menu items and prices in chalk, and while the food seemed to cost much more than he would have thought, it was still affordable to him. He placed his order, and within minutes she returned with a plate carrying a large cut of meat and a glass of water. Maki placed it down in front of him.

"Here you are." He placed a hand on her hip and smiled again. "Enjoy."

"Thanks." Noob grabbed his cutlery and made to dig into his meal.

"Well?" Maki asked.

"It's very good." Noob said between bites.

"And?" Maki's hand dropped from her hip.

"And wh-" Noob started to recognize where this conversation was going.

"That's funny; your payment windows should've opened." Maki sounded like she was talking to a puppy.

"I'm not an NPC." Noob stated simply.

"Oh! I'm so sorry." Maki cocked her hear to one side and pointed over his shoulder. "Wait, but where's your health bar?"

Noob shrugged, not sure how to answer her question. He opened his menu to pull out some money for the meal. Noob held out his hand and summoned the needed amount. The coins materialized in a neat stack and dropped into in his palm. He smiled, a little proud of his simple accomplishment of catching the item the first time.

_I'm still new at this, but I'm catching on. _ He thought. His smile inverted when he figured out the meaning of his temporary nickname, and decided he didn't like it.

He handed the coins to Maki. "I'm looking for someone. Guy named Merlot. Do you know where I might find him?"

"I only do the restaurant stuff. If you want info, you'll wanna talk to my sister." Maki tucked the money in a pocket behind her apron. "Hang on, I'll go get her."

Maki disappeared into what Noob assumed to be the back office and returned with another girl wearing a grey shirt and pants in tow. She also appeared to be about sixteen. She had shoulder length black hair framing a pretty face. The girl had a thin build and a fair complexion. There wasn't much else of note about her, apart from being identical to Maki.

"This is my sister Mori." Maki introduced.

"Hi." Mori deadpanned. She had the same voice as her sister, but without the cheer. "You're looking for Merlot? Info isn't free."

Maki nudged her sister. "C'mon, Mori. First time's on the house."

"Fine." Mori let out a sigh. "He isn't here. He's gone."

"What? Where to?" Noob asked.

"Don't know. Not here." Mori said. Maki gave her another nudge. "Some guy calling himself The Inquisitor chased all the quest brokers out of town a couple days ago. Killed one of 'em in a duel to scare off the others. Haven't seen any of 'em since."

"A real shame, too." Maki added. "Merlot's customers brought us a good chunk of business. Anything else?"

"Yeah, I'm looking for someone else." Noob spoke slowly, trying to figure out a way to phrase his question when he was referring to himself. "I don't have his name, just a physical description. Is there anywhere I could search for someone based on that?"

Mori shook her head. "Nobody has access to the system's player data. Closest thing SAO has to an accessible census is the Monument of Life."

"And what's that?" Noob asked.

Maki raised an eyebrow. "That's a total noob question. It's the big stone tablet thing in the starting city. The one listing the names of every player in SAO. Only has their names, though, so I guess it still wouldn't help if you don't know that much."

"Thanks." Noob said. "I guess that's all."

"No probs." Maki twirled and headed to greet a couple who had just entered.

Her sister lingered, her eyes narrowing slightly as she scrutinized Noob. "Who are you?"

"Noob, I guess, until I know otherwise." He answered.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Mori sat down on the bar stool to his left. "What happened to your health bar?"

Noob weighed his answer. "You're an information broker, right?"

Mori nodded. "I tend to know things."

"Can you think of any reasons why an icon or health bar would be missing?" Noob asked.

"Interesting." Mori leaned forward. "So your icon's gone, too."

Noob leaned away, starting to feel like he was under a spotlight. "Well, can you?"

"Like I said, info isn't free," Mori was still looking him over, memorizing details, "and you've already used your free questions."

"How about a trade?" Noob offered. "You tell me what you know and I'll tell you what I know."

"Fair enough." Mori leaned back to a more comfortable position for both of them. "I have absolutely no idea."

"You'd really charge for a non-answer?" Noob shrugged. "Well, I guess this _was_ a fair trade, 'cause I don't either."

Mori's lip twitched downwards before she muttered a simple. "Interesting."

She was about to ask another question when a woman butted in between them. "C'mon Mori, stop grilling the guy."

"I'm doing business here, Chie." Mori said. "We're exchanging information."

Noob finished off the last of his meal. "Actually, we were just wrapping up."

Mori looked like she was about to contest the point, but relented and excused herself. She crossed to the other end of the tavern and struck up a conversation with her sister. Chie took the now vacant seat. She looked to be in her late thirties, with a plain face and lightly curled brown hair reaching her shoulder blades. She had a womanly figure and wide hips, and was wearing casual clothes.

"I overheard you were searching for Merlot." Chie started. "You happen to be looking for a quest?"

"Yeah, I am." Noob answered.

"Well, you're out of luck, there." Chie stated. "Nobody likes quest brokers, but when they left, they took all the jobs with them."

Chie caught his confusion. "See, a broker will go into a town and snatch up all the quests they can, and then share them for a profit. Annoying, really, bottlenecking the quests. Since they make shared experience from every job of theirs completed, they're usually pretty high level players, so nobody wants to mess with them."

"And that's why they were chased out of town?" Noob ventured.

"No." Chie replied. "Rumor was some of them were working with some really shady characters. Red guilds. Nasty people like that."

Noob waited for her to continue, sensing she was leading up to something.

"Thing is, a town will only generate so many quests at a time, and they left without selling them, so they still have all those active missions." Chie explained. "Until they get rid of or cancel them, this town's dry."

Noob let out a frustrated sigh. "Well, that's just great."

Chie shifted in her seat. "So, you come here alone? You with a party?"

Noob was instantly on edge by her sudden question. "Why?"

"It just so happens that me," she gestured to a trio sitting at a nearby table, "and my friends have a quest we could use a little extra muscle with. We don't mind giving a fair share of the loot, but we don't want to split it with a whole other group. Everyone else we've come across has been partied up, or in a guild."

Noob eyed the three. One was a boy in his early twenties. His dark green hair matched his shirt, and was held back in a short ponytail. Next to him was a brawny woman with sandy blonde hair affixed in a bun. Across from them was a slightly plump man with a shaved head and a welcoming smile.

"I've got one more somewhere around town." Chie nudged her head in their direction. "C'mon, I'll introduce you. If they like you we can make a deal."

The two starting walking over to their table.

"Thanks." Noob said. "The quest isn't for me, though."

"Oh?" Chie stopped. She looked around the tavern. "Who? Where is he? I didn't see anyone else with you."

Noob remembered not to bring up Devlin to anyone other than Merlot, but couldn't think of a way to skirt the issue. "He's a little outside of town."

Chie placed her hands on her hips. "Fine, I guess we'd be okay splitting with _two_ people, but no more than that. Why is he waiting for you out there, anyways?"

"He's…uh." Noob wasn't sure if he should lie, and failed to come up with one either way.

"So you're here for a job, and your partner is waiting outside town?" the boy with the green hair asked. He had a thoughtful expression.

"Wait a second," Chie's eyes narrowed, "are you a mule?"

Noob was trying to come up with an answer when the boy flinched. He opened his menu and began tapping through it.

"Message from Amber." He said. "Says someone spotted a red player lurking outside town. Couple people just went to root him out. Says she's tagging along."

"Tell her not to get involved." Chie turned back to Noob. "That him?"

Without a word Noob turned and bolted from the tavern. Bursting through the door, he stopped a moment to recall the right direction, and took off full tilt towards the town's exit.

"Big guy's got some quick legs." The bald man quipped. "Think we should check it out?"

Chie was already walking towards the door, and the trio followed after.

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"Probably should've ran." Devlin muttered to himself.

He was sat cross legged on top of his boulder, spreading jam on a slice of bread. Below him were the three figures he'd seen exit the town before. The man in black had his chest puffed out in a pose that screamed forced bravado. The smaller man and woman he came with flanked him on either side. Several meters behind them, a crowd a couple dozen strong had formed. There was even an NPC that tagged along. Devlin chuckled to himself at the oddity.

"Come on down." The smaller boy in white said with a smirk. His hand rested on the hilt of his sheathed rapier. "All we want to do is talk."

"We _are _talking," Devlin returned, "and I think I'll stay up here."

"Get down here!" The man in black armour shouted, much more direct.

"No." Devlin finished spreading his jam. "Listen, I'm not here looking for any trouble."

"Bullshit!" He yelled back. "I saw you spying on the gates. Looking for easier prey, more like it!"

Devlin held his hand to his mouth in mock surprise. "You've caught me bloody handed. Here I was, hoping to find some lonely little orphans. Woe is me for finding such a strong man like you."

_Okay, watch your tongue. _He thought. _No need to make this worse._

"But in all seriousness," Devlin said. "I'm merely waiting for a friend; just passing through."

"More red players?" The man in black appeared unsure of himself for a split second. "You'll be dead before they get here."

"I'm still not coming down." Devlin held out his butter knife like a rapier. "Have at thee."

The man drew a knife and threw it. It flew straight into Devlin's chest. He jerked back from the impact. Devlin pulled it out and used it to trim the crust from his bread. "I'm keeping this. Do you have any more?"

Someone in the crowd laughed. The man huffed and turned to his companions. "Cassidy, Yates. Flush 'im."

With that said, the two opened their menus each summoned a long spear. Yates held his high and launched it.

_Ah, shit._ Devlin dropped down behind the rock as the projectile flew overhead. By the time he landed his sword was drawn and the trio was upon him.

Devlin blocked and dodged their strikes, staying as close to the boulders as possible. Ducking in between the larger stones, their attacks were cramped and their room confined. Blocking a high blow, Devlin saw an opening. He started to strike when he stopped himself.

_No! _He shouted internally. _Can't stay red!_

He faltered as his swing was aborted. The man in black grabbed him by the cloak and threw him into the open. Without the outcroppings providing cover, Devlin's defense was much more frantic, but still quick enough to evade their strikes. The three kept getting overeager and into each other's way until Yates stabbed his sword downwards, pinning Devlin's cloak to the ground. The crowd cheered.

_Shit! Shitshitshit!_

A trio of heavy strikes almost halved his life, and destroyed his cloak. Now free, he ducked under a swing aimed for his head. He turned to see the man in black holding his sword high, gleaming with an active skill. Lacking time to dodge and unable to use his weapons, he threw his jellied bread into his face.

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_Almost there!_

Noob was fast approaching a crowd. Behind them he could see what looked like three people attacking Devlin.

_Ok, three assailants. Don't want to use my sword unless I have to. Think fast._

Noob detached his shield from his left forearm and held it like a discus. He saw Devlin throw what looked like a slice of bread at one of them when he plowed through the crowd. Ignoring the complaints of the people behind him, he drew back his arm and let his shield fly, not slowing his momentum.

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The jam stuck the bread to his face. Suddenly blind, the man in black faltered and missed his strike. With an angry growl, he grabbed it and threw it aside just in time for a shield to slam into the bridge of his nose strong enough to knock him over.

"The he-!" Yates started to yell when Noob rammed into him at full tilt.

Noob dug his foot into the ground, skidding to a halt and launching the boy forward. Cassidy paused, still processing the sudden turn of events. The two scrambled back to their feet and regrouped.

"Thanks, big guy." Devlin patted Noob on the back. "Was starting to get a little worried."

Without the cloak masking his figure, Devlin looked much smaller. While he was only a few inches shorter than Noob, he was much leaner, with narrower shoulders and a thinner build. There was a staggering number of pockets and pouches strapped around his waist, legs and arms. He pulled a small vial from one such pocket and drank its contents. His health started to slowly refill.

"Who the hell are you?!" the man in black demanded, still wiping jam from his face.

"Might want to draw your sword." Devlin said to Noob. "Seems like a good time to rattle it."

Noob took a step towards the trio. He held his hands open and empty in front of him. "I don't want to fight you. There's no need for violence."

"The guy's got a quest companion?" Yates asked. "What's the word, Ren?"

"A little late for that." Ren, the man in black, gestured with his head and the three slowly spread out, with his companions moving to either side.

"This doesn't have to get bloody." Noob persisted. "We can all still walk away."

"Cut him down." Ren commanded. "The one in red's mine."

Yates struck first, with a simple thrust of his rapier. Noob sidestepped, narrowly dodging the attack. He stepped forward and drove his fists into his opponent's face. Noob followed with a kick to his gut that dropped him onto his back. He felt a stabbing sensation, and turned to see Cassidy behind him, her spear dug into his left kidney. He spun to face her, dislodging the spear and took hold of its shaft with both hands. Noob yanked on the weapon and Cassidy jerked forward, off balance. He delivered a punch with his left fist straight into her face, pushing her backwards. His right hand shot forward and grabbed her collar, pulling her like a ragdoll into another punch that took her off her feet.

He returned his attention to Yates, who had curled into a sitting position, getting up. Noob kicked him in the face hard enough to flop him over onto his stomach. He looked over his shoulder, seeing Devlin on the defensive from Ren. Noob took a few long strides towards him. He drove his foot into the back of his knee and shoved him. Ren fell forward onto his hands with a surprised yelp. Noob punched him in the back of his head, propelling his face down into the dirt. The crowd gave a series of excited cheers. Noob quickly put some distance between he and Devlin and their opponents while they were regaining their footing. He surveyed their health bars; he hadn't actually done all that much damage to any of them.

"It's not too late to stop this." Noob again held his hands up empty.

"What the shit guys!" Ren yelled at his compatriots. "You can't keep _one _companion off me?"

"Hang on, boss." Yates said, hesitantly. "Something's not right here."

"Yeah, he doesn't fight like an NPC." Cassidy added. "Talks too much, too."

"I'm not an NPC." Noob called out.

The crowd murmured amongst themselves. Cassidy and Yates exchanged a confused look.

"This is getting weird; he shouldn't recognize that word." Cassidy said. "Maybe we should back off."

Ren's face had turned a beat red. Noob could tell negotiating further was a dead end. He'd humiliated the man in front of a crowd, and now he felt he had to prove himself. Noob placed his hand on his sword, ready to draw it.

"You want to puss out, then fine. _I'll _handle this." Ren pointed his broadsword at Noob. "If your boyfriend doesn't want to fight, I'll take _you_."

Ren charged again with a high strike. Noob drew his sword and deflected the blow. He took a step back, not taking the opening, still hesitant, but running out of options. He blocked a strike to his left side barely in time, when Ren followed with a swing that raked his sword across his chest. Noob took another step back, moving too slow to block another attack that glanced off his right shoulder. He parried a thrust, only to have Ren continue into a swipe that cut into his thigh. Noob struck his sword out, trying to go on the attack, but his blade was batted down and a counter slice was dealt to his arm. As quickly as the red wound markers would fade, he would have another to replace it.

_I don't how to fight with this._ He thought. His health was almost in the yellow. _I can't keep this up forever._

Noob made a horizontal swing aimed at his ribs, but was deflected. Ren surged forward and shoulder checked him, trying to knock him over. Noob was heavier than his opponent gave credit, and was only pushed back a pace, while Ren rebounded awkwardly. Seeing his chance, Noob went on the offensive, landing an upwards strike that passed from Ren's left hip to his sternum. He followed with a downwards blow along the same path.

Not stopping, Noob made to thrust his sword at his gut. Ren gave an angry bellow and swatted it aside. Noob's sword arm was thrown far to the right. Wide open, Ren dealt a pair of shallow strikes across his chest, dropping his health low into the yellow.

_This guy's really trying to kill me!_ Noob thought. _Stop him!_

Ren held his sword close, point straight out, and lunged forward to impale him with it. With no time to get his sword around to block, Noob twisted his torso left and leaned back, holding his sword straight out. Ren's blade slid along his chest, digging into him. Noob's sword punched straight into his left shoulder. He grabbed Ren's extended sword arm at the wrist and pulled him further along his sword, plunging it through him. Noob's life had dropped into the red, but Ren was unable to attack with his hand clamped around his sword arm.

Ren's health was still a full yellow, but was continuously dropping while Noob's sword was stabbed through him. He jerked back, trying to free himself, but Noob held him fast, pushing the blade further, sinking it to the hilt. Ren panicked, almost losing his footing in his attempts escape. Noob glared straight into his eyes as Ren's health edged into the red.

"Yield!" he cried. "I yield!"

"Drop the sword!" Noob shouted into his face.

Ren opened his hand and his blade fell to the ground. Noob shoved him away and withdrew his sword. Half the crowd was in applause, while the other booed. He retreated to his two friends.

"You want us to finish him off?" Cassidy asked, readying her spear.

"That hardly seems necessary." Someone shouted. "If you'd been paying any attention, you'd have heard the man doesn't want to fight."

Everyone turned to see Chie and her entourage pushing through the crowd. She'd replaced her casual clothes with ivory half plate armour with ornate silver trim, and had a large shield in her left hand. She stopped her group between Noob and Ren's party.

"Show's over." Chie called to the crowd. She turned to Ren. Her hand rested on the hilt of her broadsword. "I think it's time you walked away."

"You're gonna defend this guy?" Yates accused, pointing at Devlin. "What's our move, Ren?"

"I yielded." Ren placed a hand on Yates' shoulder to silence any protest. "And we don't fight green players. Let's go."

Disappointed, the crowd headed back towards town, with a pair of stragglers staying behind. Ren and his crew each pulled out a blue crystal brick from their satchels and held them high.

He glared at Noob and Devlin. "Next time."

With his threat delivered, they activated their teleport crystals and vanished. Noob let out a relieved breath. He summoned a health potion and quickly downed it, wanting to be as far from death as possible. He watched the bar in his vision slowly fill from red to yellow. He drank another when it stopped, waiting for it to turn back to green. Noob retrieved his shield and returned it to his inventory while Devlin scooped up the sword Ren had dropped. He had already donned another identical red cloak.

"Souvenir." Devlin said, then handed the sword to Noob. "Yours now, big guy."

Noob sheathed his falcata and took the offered broadsword, holding it low and nonthreatening.

Chie stepped over, hand still on on the hilt of her own weapon. She gestured towards Devlin. "So, is this him?"

"Noob," Devlin whispered, "who are these guys."

"I suppose introductions are in order." She held her off hand towards her party. "This is my guild:"

"Cedric," The green haired boy stepped forward. He had a smooth, almost feminine face and fair skin. He was clad in light armour, with smaller plates covering his chest and back, as well as his upper arms and thighs. His armour was painted a forest camouflage. He carried a spetum style spear, and had a pair of smaller javelins held to his back.

"Haruki," The muscled woman crossed her arms and nodded. She had a man-ish, handsome complexion and wore thick, full plate tan armour that made her look more like a fortification than a person. She wielded a large labrys axe.

"and Mamoru." The short, portly bald man gave a friendly bow. He wore gunmetal grey scale mail with no sleeves, and wielded a katana.

The two stragglers from the crowd approached the group. Noob recognized one as the girl that'd spoken to him near the flower stand. She was in her mid twenties, with straight black hair reaching the nape of her neck. She was clad in light amber armour, and wielded a hand and a half sword and a medium sized kite shield.

The woman with her had a very simple set of thick leather as her armour and had a short sword. She had blonde hair tied in a long braid that reached the middle of her back. Her expression was completely flat. She had no icon and no visible health bar.

"This is Amber." Chie pointed to the former, then to the latter. "And that's Brenda…She's an NPC."

"Hi." Amber smiled and a wave. She nudged the NPC at her side. "Say 'Hi', Brenda."

"Greetings, traveler." Brenda turned to Amber. "I will avenge my family!"

"She says that a lot." Chie said. She gave a short bow. "And I am Chie, leader of the Wayward Pact."

* * *

Author's Notes: If you're reading this, thanks for sticking around long enough to see it. Hopefully you're finding my writing style at least tolerable. With the introductions out of the way things can get moving.


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